Monday, June 9, 2008

6-1-08/ 6-5-08

6-5-08 This has been my first full week back to work since school ended. Even though I had about two weeks off, as soon as I walked in the door on May 28th I got right back in the groove of things. I had a large welcome from every one of the consumers, and could tell they were excited to see that I was still there. June 2nd started a new week, and a new beginning, where I wanted to prove I would improve and do better than I had before. I have always worked M, W, and Th from 9am-2pm, but since it is the summer now and my son is out of school I offered to change my hours or days for whatever would be best for Amanda. In another week she will be going to a conference for four days, so I offered to work each of those days to assist Pam while she was gone.

Every morning when I come in to Hoosier House I run canteen. Canteen gives me a chance to talk with the consumers and get updates on their lives outside of Cummins. They tell me about their outings, families, and lives. Through this I can do a quick appraisal of how the rest of their day may go; someone may be in a bad mood, may be having elevated symptoms of their disorder, may be dealing with a recent tragedy, or just needs more praise and attention through the day. I learn to adjust the way I deal with each individual based on these quick assessments.

One female consumer is very shy so when I first see her I always give her a big greeting to make her feel welcomed, and I know I can always carry a conversation with her outside of group, yet she does not like to read out loud or be called upon during group. Another consumer always comes in to talk to me the days he is there. He seems to keep claiming elevated symptoms of medical problems, yet never shows signs during group. His own doctors have said they do not believe he has the problems he claims, yet he still tells us when he is having attacks. The very first time I heard this from him I became extremely concerned and did not know how to handle it, so I discussed it with Amanda. Now I know his behaviors so I just humor him at times while trying to still inform him I did not witness any signs of it because I do not want to add to his delusions

Most of my days seem routine since I have the same consumers, and do the same activities. At times I try to incorporate different activities, but they are not always welcomed by the consumers. They are so used to their routine and do not like deterring from it. Thursdays are Amanda’s administrative days so Pam runs group. This previous Thursday Pam was late so Amanda gave me a book of activities and asked me to pick which one I wanted to do. I chose one where the consumers had the letters of the alphabet listed and had to write one good thing about themselves that started with each letter.

They all had obvious problems with this, many not knowing words for each letter, or feeling apprehensive about writing good things about themselves. After they were done they turned the pages over and took turns trading papers with everyone else in the room. Each person had to write one good thing about everyone else. This was a little easier, yet some consumers complained about not having good things to write about certain other consumers. Some wrote generic comments such as they are nice, or they merely repeated what someone else had already written. I still enjoy trying to get them to participate in new activities, and to get them to learn new things about themselves. I guess it just takes time, and a little more work on my part to get them involved and comfortable with the idea.

In retrospect, I see the need for continual blogging/journaling during the week, as it is easy to forget simple interactions and educational experiences in one week's time. As I try to recall a full day's work for each day of a week's worth of work, it all seems to flow into a jumbled memory. It is hard to write about individual encounters or certain incidents in as much needed detail when it is a full week after it happened. I need to work on making a regular schedule to blog, and to figure out better how to go about it. I think writing daily would be too much, although waiting an entire week becomes too general and in my opinion does not explain my experience well enough.

I also am having a problem with how much or how far I can write about people or experiences in group. I know I cannot name names, but when it comes to a person's disorder or things that happened, I am not sure how much detail I can write without breaking confidentiality. I know this blog is an educational tool to write about my experiences at my practicum, but I must consider that this is a public venue. So how much is too much?

I also need to just write directly in my blog instead of keeping it in a file, then adding it later. I think it is good that I realize and discuss certain things that I need to work on that way I do not fall into my same old habits and get behind.I know I still have many things I need to work on to become the excellent student and social worker that I wish to become.

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